Every Household Has Crunch Points, And They Repeat
The same three hours go wrong every week, and they are fixable once you name them.
Most household stress is not evenly spread. It clusters. There is usually a weekday morning that goes badly, an evening between arriving home and eating that is worse than the others, and a stretch on Sunday when the coming week arrives all at once. These are not personality clashes, though they get experienced as such. They are structural pinch points where too many things must happen in too small a window, usually with everyone tired and at least one person running late.
Naming the crunch points changes what you argue about. Instead of a general sense that things are hard, you have a specific twenty minutes on a specific day that reliably produces short tempers. That is something you can attack. Sometimes the fix is moving one task out of the window entirely, into the night before or the weekend. Sometimes it is deciding that during that window one person is fully in charge and the other simply does what is asked, no negotiation, because negotiating is what is blowing it up. Sometimes it is accepting a lower standard for those twenty minutes and no others.
It is worth watching for a few weeks before changing anything. Households are quick to blame the most recent bad evening on whoever was involved in it, and slow to notice that the same evening has gone the same way for two years. A pattern that survives three or four weeks of observation is a structural problem. A one off is just a bad night, and bad nights do not need a system, they need everyone to go to bed.